Dead or Alive?
by Eva Masen-Pattinson
Summary: Senior student Bella is intrigued by the mysterious and good-looking boy that appears everytime she's in trouble -her angel- as she calls him is very intriguing and a new student in Forks High School. Bella is a normal teenager with problems and self esteem issues. Nothing makes sense in her life. She has decided to end her suffering. Will Edward Cullen make her change her mind?
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer**: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

_**Warning:** Some chapters may contain adult themes, swearing._

_**A/N:** My stories can also be found at TWCS with the same name and my same user name/penname._

**_UPDATED 1/24/2013: I changed the position of some chapters to help with the flow of the story._**

**_UPDATED 4/23/2013: I merged chapter 1 and 2. Nothing else was changed in those chapters._**

_**Chapter Note**: **This is just an introduction to Bella's feelings and inner questions. The next chapters will develop the story more. The story has different POVs, mostly Bella's and Edward's.**_

**Chapter 1**

All my life I've known what I want and what I don't want. Living wasn't one of the things I wanted. Life has ups and downs, some of us seem to know only the downs. Why was it that way?

Ever since I was a little girl, I have tried to end with the suffering. I guess I was a normal child. I used to laugh, I used to love, I used to play with my toys. But I wasn't happy. I have always wondered why am I alive? Of the millions of sperms and eggs that could have turn into a baby, why was I the "lucky one" to come to planet earth? Why couldn't I have stayed in the nothingness?

As the years pass by those thoughts have come and gone. I'm starting to see a pattern. They come when I'm unhappy and they leave when I'm happy. I guess they are connected somehow with my emotions.

Memories come to my mind about the first time I tried to end my life. I can't recall exactly how old I was, but I can tell you, I was somewhere between 4 and 7 years old. Yes, I was very young. I can see every detail of that day as if it were yesterday...

For a reason that I can't remember, I was alone in my house or the nanny probably was in the house, I'm not sure. I was very upset because my parents always compared me with other children, if it wasn't my cousins it would be the children of a friend. I was not good at all, it didn't matter how hard I tried I was never good enough in my parents' eyes. I was tired of trying hard to please them, I didn't understand why they didn't like me. I knew that they didn't hate me, but our relationship wasn't the best relationship that could exist.

I took a knife from the cupboard and headed to the bathroom, I sat down on top of the toilet and started sobbing and saying good-bye to every part of my tiny body. Good-bye stomach, good-bye legs, good-bye arms, good-bye belly button, I'm sorry. I held the knife and pointed to my belly button, this was going to be the end of everything, my parents will finally be happy, I won't be around to trouble them, I will be at peace.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, tears were falling down my cheeks, then I remembered my grandparents how sweet they were with me, I loved them so much, I loved my toys, I liked eating ice cream. I couldn't do it, I just couldn't, things weren't that bad after all. I went out of the bathroom to the kitchen and left the knife in the cupboard, as if nothing had happened.

* * *

_Bella, Bella, are you alright?_

_I think she hurt her head when she fall dow_n.

Why were they calling my name?, what fall down? why couldn't I see them? What's that smell, it's so strong it smells very bad. _-You have to open your eyes Bella-_ Whose voice is that? Am I in heaven? that voice sounds too peaceful, it sounds like an angel calling my name, maybe I should do what the angel is telling me to do. And then I saw him, he was the most beautiful boy I've ever seen in my entire life, he was surrounded by a white and crystalline light. I was in heaven.

_**Final Notes**: **Edward is coming.**_

_**Thank you for reading my story. Let me know what you think. More chapters to come.**_

_**This chapter is shorter than the chapters to come, you'll get more information in the following chapters. ***Surprises are to be expected.*** **_


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: This chapter was needed to explain Bella's POV. **_

_**Next chapter will introduce the mysterious boy.**_

**Chapter 2**

Mrs. Lynn, the nurse at Forks High School was very sweet and tender she is in her sixties, but still she's very beautiful. I had been her patient a couple of times. I guess that being accident prone like me one has the tendency to visit the nurse as a daily routine. The room was lit with a bright light, the smell of alcohol and medicine have always make me nauseous; that combine with the salty smell of blood -_my blood_- made me feel worse.

-"How are you feeling Bella?" Mrs. Lynn asked while checking my pulse.

_Nauseated_. -"I've been better" I said that just to get out of the clinic, I don't like being on the spotlight and having just looked at the door and seeing a group of students gathering outside the nurse's office made me feel even worse.

"You're pretty lucky Bella, considering the fact that you fell down a flight of stairs. The bleeding has stopped and your vitals are almost normal, but I have asked your father to take you to the doctor and check if you have any concussion just to be sure".

Oh no, Charlie will be mad at me, and my mom; she'll be furious. They hate going to the hospital and the medical bills! I'm sure they can't wait for me to start working to pay for them. "You've called my dad?"

"Yes, of course I called your parents Bella, it's standard procedure, and your father said he'll be here in a couple of minutes".

"Great" I can't wait to hear his lecture.

"Mrs. Lynn, can I go and wait for him outside the clinic? I don't want to take more of your time, I'm sure other students may need you more than I do"

"Oh Bella, you know you're always welcome, though I'll prefer you wouldn't come to visit me as a patient, you have to be more careful"

"I will Mrs. Lynn, thank you for your help" She helped me get off the gurney; I hadn't realized how sore I was until I stood up. I started wondering how I got to the clinic, who was that beautiful guy? _My angel_, I had to find out who he was, I have to thank him. "Mrs. Lynn, can you tell me who brought me to the clinic?"

You don't remember? I'm glad I asked your father to take you to the doctor and check that head of yours. Well, I don't know his name Bella, I think he's in your class. I'm not sure, it was the first time that I met him, and he looked worried. He seemed rather fond of you, I think he might be outside waiting for you. Why do you want to know?"

This is news, I don't remember having any good-looking guy as a friend, I wonder who could that be. "I want to thank him for carrying me all the way to the clinic, I'm glad he found me" As I finished my explanation I walk to the door. I am intrigued about the mysterious boy with beautiful eyes, I don't remember seeing him before, I wonder what his name is, I wonder if he's really in my class... maybe he's the new student everyone was talking about in school. They say his family comes from France; apparently his dad was transferred to work in Windsor Merging, a marketing consulting company, subsidiary in Forks. I can't imagine being transferred in the middle of the school year, he must be feeling as an outcast.

I decided to sit and wait for my parents outside of the clinic, I was starting to feel dizzy, maybe I do have a concussion after all. I look at my watch it was noon, I'm famished! I haven't eaten anything since I had breakfast, maybe I could get something from the vending machine. As I walk to the vending machine I have the feeling that someone is following me, I've never walked in the corridors during classes, I turn around and see no one following me, maybe I'm paranoid.

I get some cookies and a juice, mmmmmm this is great, I love apple juice. On my way to the clinic I gathered my bag and some things from my locker; I'll call Angela and ask her if we have homework. I continued walking, the feeling of being followed returned, and I start walking faster and faster. I turn around to check if someone is behind me, and I trip, before I reach the floor someone grabs me just in time and I scream, but his hand muffles any sound. My heart is pounding quickly, I can't make any sense of what just happened, as I try to look at the person that is holding me around my waist, I realized that he's the same guy that rescued me before. When I try to ask for his name, the voice of my dad echoes my name, I'm in more trouble now, being the Chief of Police he doesn't have time to waste, I have to hurry before he finds me.

The sneaky boy helps me gather my stuff and gives me a shy smile. "Thank you" is all I managed to say, and I start my way to the clinic wondering if I should be fond of or afraid of the mysterious boy.

_**A/N:** **Thank you for reading, let me know what do you think. More chapters to come.**_

_**Thank you to the beta reader for this chapter Chase Corin for all the help.**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Thank you for reading.**_

_**I was very eager to post this chapter... my favorite chapter so far.**_

**Chapter 3**

Dying would have been easier…

It doesn't matter what I do and how good I do it, it's never good enough for my parents… I'm tired of all this drama.

I have never imagined it was possible for me to be in much pain. After the beat up that Charlie gave me when coming home from the hospital and Renée's lecture with a very loud voice and words that no one would ever want to hear. My heart is numb, my sinews are very sensitive. This makes me questioned again why am I still alive? I think the world would be a better place if I wasn't here. Ok, maybe not the entire world but the people I know.

Until now I have only felt intrigued about the mysterious boy, but now I'm actually mad at him. Why did he get on my way? I was so close this time; it almost looked like a typical-Bella accident. If he had left me there, I may have bled to death. I wouldn't be crying, suffering and wishing I wasn't here.

*********************.**

I must have cried myself to sleep. I'm on my bed; I'm wearing the same clothes from yesterday. As I sit up I realize that my body aches a lot. Damn! I looked myself in the mirror and I looked like crap. My hair is a mess and my arms and jaw have purple bruises, they hurt as bad as they look. How am I going to go to school looking like this? My parents won't let me stay and rest as the doctor recommended, they think that missing a day of school is like losing all that you worked so hard to get.

I decided to use the make-up kit that Jessica gave me as a birthday present. I applied foundation and concealer, it seems to work. I hope it last the entire day; just to be sure I'll take the make-up to school.

Driving all the way to school, I feel more relaxed; maybe because I took 2 Advil with my breakfast. I park in the usual place. I feel everybody is looking at me; maybe the make-up doesn't work after all. I look myself in the mirror and the make-up seems to be in place.

In Trigonometry, I feel like I'm going to fall asleep. I didn't sleep as well as I usually do. Mr. Varner's class seemed to pass slower than normal. I started drawing on my book instead of copying the information on the board. I'm not in the mood to study, I find myself drawing those mystic eyes that I saw yesterday.

At lunch, I sit in the same table with my group of friends, though we're not as close as you expect friends to be. Mike and Jessica are talking about their plans for the weekend, it seems like they're going to Seattle for shopping. Angela and Eric are kissing passionately, they can't wait to finish school and get married. I'm jealous of them. I wish I could find someone to spend my entire life. Maybe if I had someone in my life, he could take care of me and clean my tears away. But I know that is impossible. No one could ever love me, I am not worthy of any type of affection.

On my way to Spanish class, I thought I saw the guy. I decided to follow him and see where he was heading to. He was taking the same corridors as if he was going to the Spanish class, I didn't remember seeing him in that class. I waited for him to enter and then I let other students pass before me, I went to sit down on my seat. Ana, my Spanish partner had been sick, so I've been sitting by myself. I looked around to see if I caught a sight of where the boy was sitting, but it seemed like he had disappeared. Señor Molina started the class and told us he had a surprise for us. He introduced the boy that I had followed, as Edward Cullen.

Edward introduced himself in fluent Spanish, everybody was impressed. He almost spoke as well as Señor Molina. Everyone started clapping as Edward finished his introduction, Señor Molina sent him to sit by my side. He seemed to recognize me as he walked to his chair. We didn't have time for introductions, because the class was very entertaining. Spanish is my favorite subject, I don't like to waste time in that class.

Señor Molina assigned the class project. Edward and I have to work together for the rest of the school year; I really miss Ana right now. I can't imagine how working with Edward will be like. I still have mix feelings for him, he seems oblivious of that.

Edward and I exchanged some glances at each other, every time he catches me looking at him, he smiles in return. Every time I catch him looking at me, I blush in return. That is so unfair, how does he manage to be so at ease? The bell rings announcing the end of the day. I stood up to go out of class but Edward stopped me, he wants to talk.

"¿Cómo estás Bella?" Edward asks in perfect Spanish, I laugh because he seems to still be thinking in Spanish even though the class had finished minutes ago. I decide to play along and reply in Spanish "I'm good. Thank you for helping me out yesterday." He seems intrigued, as he continues the interrogation "What did your dad tell you yesterday? He sounded very upset"

"He was upset, I guessed he was concerned about me." I lie; Edward doesn't need to know the truth about Charlie. There is something that I need to know, so I ask him "How did you know my name?" No one had introduced us before today and if I remembered correctly he called me by my name when I was unconscious. Edward is quick to answer "The other students were calling your name, so I figured that had to be your name. It suits you"

"What do you mean with it suits me?" I am curious to know.

"It's a beautiful name for a beautiful girl." He says it with a big smile on his face. I couldn't believe what he had said, "You're kidding, right?"

"Why would I be joking about the obvious?" I couldn't handle it, no one have ever told me that I was beautiful. I am starting to feel unease; the effect of the medicine was ending. So I decide to head home, "I have to go now." He looks at me with disbelief; I guess no one had turned him down before. He stood speechless while I walked outside the classroom.

I finally reach my locker and I was trying to put it in order before leaving to my house. As I close it, I am surprised to see Edward standing next to me. "I'm sorry if I had scared you, I didn't mean to." "Well, it didn't work, are you following me?" I am starting to get annoyed by him, I didn't like to have people watching every step I made. "No, I wasn't following you. My locker is next to yours, see?" He says as he opens his locker, I hadn't realized that locker was empty. "Why, do you want me to follow you?" "Ehh, no thank you, you've done enough for me"

"That's too bad; I was expecting you will guide me thru the corridors. I am still new, and I get lost easily" I didn't want to be a bad person, so I told him that I could help him find his car.

We walked silently until we got to the parking lot; there are less than twenty cars. It wouldn't be hard to find his car. "So, what color is your car?" "It's gray, a gray Volvo." He says with such pride, _men and cars_, I will never understand it. I am looking for a gray car, because I have no idea of what a Volvo is. Then I finally see one gray car, and I point at it with so much strength that I can't help but to scream at the end. I had forgotten about how sore I was. Edward runs and gets to my side in an instant, he looks petrified. "Bella! What happened? Do you need anything?" The pain makes me breathe faster; tears are falling down my cheeks. He is concerned. He takes his handkerchief out of his pocket and cleans my tears. "You don't look good Bella, I better take you to the clinic." All I manage to do is shake my head. "Let me carry your bag then" I give him my bag and we continue walking to his car. "Is your car near?" I seem to be able to speak now, "It's close enough."

"How close exactly?"

"One block, I can walk, don't worry."

"I'm not letting you walk that far Bella, I can take you to your car" He has a point, I don't want to walk. I am tired, it had been a long day. "Ok, thank you Edward."

The interior of his car matched the exterior. The car is modern and neat, Edward must be a control freak. "I like your car Edward, is way cooler than mine." "We'll see Bella, I still need to see yours." I direct Edward to my truck, he parks next to it. "Yours is not bad Bella, is antique. I like it." My truck was _antique, _but I love it. It had belonged to my grandparents, so I am very fond of it. "Thank you, it belonged to my grandparents" Edward gives me my bag until I am in my truck. "Are you sure you want to drive all the way to your house? I won't mind to take you there" His offer didn't seem bad, I was tired after all. But what would I do with my truck? I decided to skip this time, and told him I will consider his offer in the future. He seemed happy about it. We said good-bye and exchange phone numbers. I was starting to like Edward Cullen.

_**A/N:** Thank you for reading. More chapters to come. Don't hesitate to send me a Private Message (PM) or a review._

_Thank you to the beta reader for this chapter: dinkadot._

_Edward's POV is next._


	4. Chapter 4

_Random thought: Sometimes first love doesn't equal true love._

* * *

**Chapter 4**

**_Edward's POV_**

Growing up in Chicago I learned to love the big city life, I also learned to enjoy the outdoors. I had the most perfect childhood; my parents have always granted me with anything that I could think of.

Life has been busy. My dad, Carlisle, is a well-known producer. He likes having our family together, so we moved constantly because of his job. My mom, Esme, is an interior designer, but she has never worked. She is a housewife and she's great at it; she is the core of our family. I adore her to death. Alice, my sister is one year younger than me. She can be obnoxious sometimes, but she has a special place in my heart. I know that mom and dad love us equally, but Alice is my dad's little princess. He'll do anything for her.

We have lived in many countries and that enables me to speak many languages. I'm very fond of Spanish and French, both languages were necessary in my life. We moved to France when I was 12 years old, right after we left Spain. We lived in France for 5 years; we returned to the United States for the holidays. I could say that France had a big influence in my life. My first and only girlfriend was French, but that's a memory I don't want to recollect.

People don't believe me when I tell them that I lived in France for that long; they expect me to have an accent, but I don't. Maybe because we weren't allow to speak French in our house. Mom always expected us to behave as we were in America, so we celebrated all the American traditions and festivities.

Living in Europe allowed me to develop a taste for classical music. My favorite author is Debussy, Claire De Lune is one of my favorite songs. Because of that I learned to play the piano, I've created some compositions. Some of them were inspired by the nature that surrounded us in France, others are inspired by the people that mean and meant something for me, like my mom, my grandparents and Elena.

Elena was my first love. She was my neighbor and classmate. Elena was the most beautiful girl I've ever seen in my entire life. Her eyes were the color of the sky, they were so bright and her eyelashes were endless. She had dark hair and her skin appeared to be porcelain, it was too soft and perfect. I thought that we'd have a life together full of love. But destiny is uncertain, I am now sure of that.

I promised to never love again, my heart wouldn't resist more pain. It has been a year since Elena's death and I still remember her every day. Even though we weren't together when she passed away; I still think that it was my fault.

I'm glad we left France, I couldn't stay there anymore. Every place reminded me of Elena. I was failing in school because I couldn't concentrate; I couldn't go out because Elena and I visited almost every place in town. I didn't have friends anymore. When she died a part of me died with her; I was broken.

My parents were worried about me; I wasn't the happy son they once had. Dad requested a transfer to the States. I tried to make them realized that I was fine, that they shouldn't worry about me; I failed in my attempt. I wasn't thrilled to move to Forks, the wettest place in the US. Alice was mad to leave her friends, but not as mad as she was to leave the French boutiques. She really loved them.

Transferring to a new school in the middle of my senior year was not easy. American schools are not that different to French schools, but I've heard about kids being bullied by fellow classmates. Luckily I've never experienced that before and it seemed that for now I was safe.

My first day in Forks High school was nothing but extraordinary. Girls practically threw themselves to me; I thought there weren't boys in Forks. Mom has always said that I'm handsome, but moms always see their children as runway models. Maybe she was right after all. I don't like to be in the spotlight, so all that attention was overwhelming. Alice in the other hand loves to be noticed. She doesn't hold back; boys used to fight for her in our former school, she seemed to enjoy it. My classmates kept asking me to go out and take Alice with me; I never agreed. No one seems good enough for her; I guess that's what big brothers do.

I was looking for the Gym, when I saw a girl falling down the stairs. I ran towards her and she was unconscious, I didn't know what to do. I didn't notice when some students got around her, they were calling her name _Bella_, but she didn't seem to react. I got closer and kneeled down next to her. I could see she was breathing. I started calling her name as well and suddenly she opened her eyes. She had the most beautiful brown eyes I've ever seen. She seemed confused and then she passed out again. The students around us kept making jokes and saying things about her being clumsy and accident prone. I couldn't stand them, I felt very protective of her. She was so frail. I took her in my arms and a blond boy was eager to help, he showed me the way to the clinic.

The nurse wasn't surprised to see her; I guessed the students were right about Bella. The nurse asked me to lay Bella on a gurney. She reminded me of Sleeping Beauty; except for the fact that she was covered in blood and not under a spell. I remembered I had to go to the Gym, the nurse gave me a permit for my absence. I didn't want to leave the clinic, but I had no choice.

Then it was time for lunch, I met with Alice in the cafeteria. She was enjoying her classes and she had already found out about all the malls in the city. Lunch passed so quickly, I barely touched my sandwich. I was still thinking of Bella, she really made honor to her name, at least in Spanish. She was really beautiful.

I was lost again, or maybe it was an excuse to check on Bella. I was walking around the corridors when I saw her grabbing something from the vending machine. I didn't want to scare her, so I hid behind a wall. For what I saw, she was dizzy. I had to make sure she wouldn't fall again.

She started walking faster, I thought she was feeling better after all then she turned around and tripped with her own feet. I rushed to her as fast as I could and got there before she hit the ground. She was startled, I tried to calm her down and put my hand on her mouth. Her lips felt soft and her heart is pounding as fast as the flight of a hummingbird. I helped her get on her feet and she looked like she was going to ask me something, she just said thank you as I help her gathered her stuff.

I broke my promise; I had fallen in love again.

_**A/N:** Please let me know your comments, I really appreciate them. Thank you for following and adding my story to your favorites and for your reviews and PM's._


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N: I promised surprises...**_

**Chapter 5**

Edward and I are walking in the forest located near my house. He makes me feel queasy sometimes, maybe is the fact that he's so confident and good-looking. He seems to enjoy the outdoors. He's wearing all the apparel that you could find in a camping magazine. I'm sure Edward will enjoy buying clothes at Newton's Outfitters. Mike Newton will be thrilled.

I'm wearing my usual clothes, a shirt and jeans. I want to show Edward the river, my favorite place in Forks. I go there when I want to relax and to escape the reality that awaits for me at home. Maybe is not a good idea to show him the river. I want to have that piece of heaven just to myself, but something inside me is pushing me to take him there. I decided I will show Edward the river after all.

Edward stops near some bushes, he is whistling; he tells me he's imitating the calling of a blue jay. It sounds really nice. I love the outdoors, but Edward takes it to the next level.

Going to the forest is something that bothers Charlie; he doesn't like it when I go there. I guess that's the main reason why I adore going to the river, I can be alone and make Charlie upset at the same time. But dad has a good reason to be worried about the forest, some years ago his best friend Billy Black and him were out in the forest hunting for bears. Some hunters had been drinking alcohol in the area and they were playing with their rifles, Billy got shot in the back. He's in a wheelchair since that incident. Billy is lucky to have Jacob as his son. Jacob is a nice person; he's the closest thing to a friend for me. I just wish he could have enjoyed his teen years more. He had to grow up faster to take care of his dad. Jacob's mom left him with his dad, when he was two years old. That has to explain why Jacob doesn't trust women; he's afraid to fall madly in love and that later he'll have his heart broken.

I can't help to notice that Edward and I are dressed in the same color pallet; what a nice coincidence. If only I look as great as Edward does, his hair is an incredible copper; the sun just makes it brighter. His eyes seem to change color. I remembered the first time I saw him when I was unconscious; his eyes were an incredible gray. But now that he's wearing a sky-blue shirt, his eyes are an amazing blue.

The sound of running water makes me realize we're getting closer to the river; Edward seems to notice it too. We decided to run and see who gets to the river first. I'm not the athletic type of girl; I fall down in flat surfaces, so it won't be a big surprise if Edward wins the race.

I have lost track of Edward, he's really fast. He must be in the river by now, I keep a steady pace I don't want to fall down and ruin the day. Out of nowhere I hear a gunshot; my heart and feet race to the river. I start screaming for Edward, but I hear no reply. _Let him be okay, let him be okay,_ I keep repeating that mantra in my head. I feel like I'm running miles and I can't reach the river, I thought it was close. Finally I reach the river; and my heart skips a bit when I see a body lying in some rocks. His sky-blue shirt is cover in blood.

**_Final Notes: I'm sorry for making this chapter shorter than the others... I had an accident and not feeling very well, but I had to write down what I had in mind._**

**_I promise, next chapter will make things clearer._**

**_More chapters to come. Please continue reviewing or PM with questions/suggestions._**


	6. Chapter 6

**_A/N: I hope that Christmas gave you the time to share with your love ones and that it brings light to your life._**

**_ Thank you for reading, reviewing and adding my story in your favorites and alerts._**

**_This chapter clarifies the last chapter._**

**Chapter 6**

_"All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream." ― Edgar Allan Poe_

_No Edward, no!_

I wake up in the middle of the night; my heart is pounding too fast. I'm covered in sweat, my face is full of tears. I haven't had a nightmare since a long time ago. I stand up and go to my bathroom to clean myself.

Now that I'm clean I realized it's five o'clock; I don't feel tired anymore so I decide to lay down on my bed. I have a lot to think of. First, why was I crying while I was dreaming? I've just met Edward, he's not important to me, is he? I have to admit that he's handsome; who am I trying to kid? He's more than handsome, he is the vivid image of a runway model. He reminds me of ancient gods, I haven't seen his naked body; but he still managed to show a great body under all those layers of clothes. I have to stop thinking about him, he's just being friendly because he's new. He will never want to be more than friends with me. I'm sure that Rosalie has already targeted him as her prey. Poor Edward, he doesn't stand a chance against Rosalie, she's a vixen; all the boys at school drool for her. I can picture them holding hands and everybody stopping to set eyes on the two most beautiful students of Forks High school.

It's almost time to get ready for school, so I start looking what I'm going to wear today. I can't help thinking about the dream I've just had; and as if some joke of destiny I find the sky-blue shirt that I was wearing in my dream. I match the shirt with some jeans; the bruises are still present, but they are barely visible. I apply make-up again and comb my hair to one side, it hangs loosely on my chest. I look presentable but I still think that wearing make-up is a waste of time.

I go downstairs and head to the kitchen. Mom has left an empty bowl for me on the kitchen island, I guess I'm having cereal for breakfast. Charlie is not in the house, he had to leave to attend a conference in Seattle.

I have Calculus on the first period. I don't really like that class because it's too complicated. Mrs. Smith is not good giving explanations and you can't really make any questions; she'll stare at you making you feel dumb for not understanding. I have to study a lot for the exam, I need to get an "A" to graduate with honors. Thinking about graduation makes me excited; I can't wait to go to university, though I haven't heard from any university yet. I'm applying for a scholarship because we can't afford it.

* * *

To my surprise and _delight_, Edward Cullen is in Calculus too. Why can't I stop grinning as an idiot? Edward smirks and waves his hand; he's waiting for Mrs. Smith's introduction.

Mrs. Smith introduced Edward and she seemed affected by his charm. I guess there's not an age limit to resist him. Edward sits behind me. I wish Mike switch places with him; I'll try to convince him somehow.

The bell rings and I sigh with relief because it was my turn to pass to the board. Mike and I go out of the class and head to the Gym. PE is not my favorite class; I only like it when we have to swim. I tried to look for Edward but he's nowhere to be seen.

Time seems to fly by, maybe because we're seniors and have a lot of things to do; especially because Mr. Greene –the Principal– wants everybody to agree with all senior year traditions. Instead of leaving at three o'clock we have to meet every now and then in the auditorium to plan the prom, the class's yearbook. Today is one of those days. Mike is in the prom committee along with Jessica. Eric, Angela and I are part of the yearbook commission. I don't have an active role, I just joined because I needed the extra credit.

We're a small group in comparison to other schools. There are one hundred and twenty senior students. Rosalie Hale is the class president; if you're a cheerleader, captain of the debate team you are meant to be popular and add impressive genes to the mix and you'll have the recipe to success. There was not a single girl in school that didn't envy Rosalie; she is the incarnation of a Barbie doll. Blond hair, blue eyes, pink cheeks and a statuesque body. Rosalie's brother, Jasper is very attractive too, but he is more reserved than Rosalie. They are very fortunate, their father owns a multinational company; they don't have to worry about getting scholarships.

The meeting is about to start and I can't see Edward, maybe he is lost so I send him a message asking him if he knew about the senior year meeting that was about to start in the auditorium. My cell phone rings in response: _I'm already there, thank you. _I look around and I can't see him.

Mr. Greene started the meeting congratulating the school board and the different committees and commissions for their hard work. Then he handed the mic to Rosalie, who started talking about the prom.

Thirty minutes later and the meeting is over. Mike, Jess, Eric and Angela asked me to join them to the theater. We were walking toward the parking lot when I saw Edward and Rosalie talking, they looked perfect together. They were talking and laughing. Rosalie was touching Edward's arm and shoulder, Edward seemed to enjoy it. As we walked by them, Edward caught sight of me and left Rosalie alone. She wasn't happy; she was looking at me with rage in her eyes. Angela and Jess pushed me towards Edward. I stumbled and Edward caught me. I am blushing.

"Thank you for catching me."

"Don't worry. It's a pleasure to help you."

"Thank you, so how was your day?" I could feel Rosalie's piercing glance at my back.

"It was alright. Except for the fact that I couldn't sit next to you, that was a bummer." _He wanted to sit down next to me._ I feel all the blood in my body running towards my cheeks. Edward seems to notice it because he is grinning. I didn't reply to that, so he continues "So, is the guy in Calculus your boyfriend?" I knew that Mike had feelings for me in the past, but sometimes he still looks at me with wanton in his eyes.

"Oh, Mike? No, we're just friends. He has a girlfriend"

"Oh, ok. Then maybe I can convince him to switch places with me" I guess I am not the only one who wants that to happen, but I can't let him know about my feelings.

"What makes you think I want you to sit with me?" Maybe I am being too harsh. Edward seems disappointed.

"I thought you'd like some help in class, I'm good at Calculus." That was an offer I couldn't resist.

"Oh well, if you put it like that. I guess we could talk to Mike. I need to get an A."

"Not a problem. We could even get an A+" I wonder if he is being serious or just being cocky, then he adds "Do you have any plans for today?"

"Some friends are talking about going to the movies. I'm not sure what movie they want to see."

"That sounds good, can I join you?" That would be interesting, finally I'll use the offer two tickets for the price of one.

"Sure. Then we'll save fifty percent."

"Even better." I couldn't help but notice people staring at us, they have a look of disbelief in their eyes. "When are you leaving?"

"We're going there right now."

"Right now?" Edward sounds disappointed.

"Yes. Is there a problem?" _No, please, no. I really want to go out with him._

"Sort of. I have to give my sister a ride home."

"Oh, I see." Right on cue, a girl with a pixie haircut and blue eyes covers Edward's eyes with her hands. Edward seems to be used to this game.

"Alice, I know it's you." She is enjoying herself, giggling in silence.

After some minutes, Edward is starting to lose his temper. "Alice!" he yells and with a quick and precise movement releases himself from Alice's hold.

Alice is very beautiful, she is a bit shorter than me and she is also very slender and pale. Her hair, black as a moonless night, contrasts her skin perfectly.

"Bella, this is my sister Alice. Alice this is Bella."

"Hi, Bella!" Alice catches me off guard and gives me a tight hug. She is very energetic. Edward is incredulous.

"Alice, Alice not too strong, you'll hurt her."

"Edward, you know I'll never hurt your girlfriend." Now, it was Edward's turn to get tomato red. He looks at me in shock. I decide to interfere "Sorry Alice, we're just friends"

"Oh! Bummer, I really want a sister."

"Alice please, you'll scare Bella."

"I'm sorry Bella, I'm just messing with Edward. He's too serious sometimes, I'd promised myself to make him laugh at least once per day."

"She's very good at it, I can assure you." Edward is now playing with Alice's hair, Alice is not pleased. They seem to be close. I always wonder what it would feel like to have a sibling.

"I'm sorry. I realize now I interrupted your conversation."

"Well Alice, you came right on time. We were just talking about you."

"Hey! What were you saying?" She was serious now.

"We want to go to the theater with other students, but I've just remembered I have to take you home." Alice seemed to be processing the information. For a minute no one said anything.

"I could take the car, and you could ride with Bella." That seemed a good idea.

"That's a great idea, we could do that Edward."

"Ok, sure. Just promise me you won't do anything reckless Alice."

"I promise it, Edward." For the look on Edward's face, I wasn't sure if he was concerned about his sister or about his car.

_**Final Notes: I hope that you've enjoyed reading the chapter. **__**I have nothing against people that wear make-up every day. **_I agree with Bella, I personally don't like to wear make-up every day. But I enjoy dressing up for special occasions. I mean haven't you noticed when someone that wears make-up every day, and suddenly one day decides to go natural; everybody start asking them if they feel alright, or if they're sick. I prefer wearing make-up in special occasions, so when I do it everybody are suprised and start giving you compliments; that makes me feel good.

_**Don't hesitate to PM me with doubts. Thank you for taking your time to read my story. More chapters to come.**_


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

_**UPDATED 1/24/2013**: I changed the position of some chapters to help with the flow of the story._**  
**

The movie was alright, but don't ask me what it was about because I wasn't really paying attention. I was focused on Edward's face, it looks like it was chiseled in marble. All the angles of his face look like if they were symmetrically measured; he can't be more perfect.

After the theater we went to the local burger shop. It's not the best food in town, but I can't expect something better for a couple of bucks. I'm glad that Edward made it, I hate being the 5th wheel, yep I said 5th wheel because every time we go out I'm the only one without a partner, and that's the most annoying thing in the world. While the two official couples on the table are eating themselves with kisses Edward and I talk about random stuff. I can't tell that I'm not the only one that feels uncomfortable.

We decide to go outside and wait for them in the parking lot. We sit down in the sidewalk, I can feel Edward's warmness near me. I have always wondered why boys' body temperature is higher than women. Edward seems to be miles away, he looks contrite. I wonder what he's thinking. After a while he remembers that I'm next to him and starts talking about the meeting that we had today. It seems that private schools have fewer students than what I have imagined. Edward doesn't say much about his life in Europe, I wonder why. Did he get in trouble or did he have a bad time there? I don't want to pry, so I change the subject.

It turns out that he enjoys playing the piano, and he also composes melodies. I must hear him someday. A phone call takes me out of my reverie. Mom has called demanding me to go home as soon as possible. Apparently I'm grounded and I shouldn't go out. Edward looks scared while my mom yells at me over the phone.

"Is everything alright Bella?", I guessed concerned is a better word than scared.

"Mom wants me to go home ASAP, apparently I'm grounded for falling down in the school"

"That doesn't make sense, why would she ground you?"

"You can never be sure with my parents. They may even ground me for breathing the air in the house"

"Are they always like that?"

"Yes. They tend to overreact" That word falls short. They are very severe and they are always right. "If you want to stay, I could ask Eric to drive you home"

"I don't think I want to stay alone with them, besides it's late I don't want you to drive by yourself" Edward seems to overreact too. I know how to take care of myself.

"That's not necessary Edward, I've been driving by myself in this town for almost two years, I know how to take care of myself"

"It would give me some peace of mind Bella, besides I need to learn all the shortcuts in town"

"If you insist then let's just say good-bye to the guys and head home"

Edward and I say our good-byes to our friends. When I reach Edward's home, he insists in following me to my house in his car. I don't have a choice. Edward is already behind my car, so I start driving. I couldn't help noticing how big his house is. It's huge! I have never seen a house that big. I'm amazed, the house is modern with a touch of classic. It has two floors and is surrounded by their personal forest. I guessed the rumors were true. His family is wealthy. I can't ever imagine myself in a house like that. It's surreal.

When I get home I wave Edward good-bye, but he doesn't seem to notice and gets out of his car. I park my truck and Edward hurries to open my door and helps me out.

"We don't live that far from each other, maybe I could pick you up and we can go together to school. I mean car-pooling is good for the environment."

"As long as we help the environment." I say sarcastically, but Edward doesn't seem to notice.

"That's another good reason"

"I don't think that's a good idea. I'm sorry."

"Why not? You'd be saving gas and I'll learn some shortcuts. It's a win-win situation."

"If you put it like that." I need money for my tuition, and it sounds like a great deal.

"Then we have a deal. I'll pick you up tomorrow."

"Then see you tomorrow. Goodnight" I turn around to lock my truck but I'm stopped by Edward's hold on my waist. He turns me around and gets me closer to him; our bodies reacting to the encounter. His touch sends electricity to my skin and my stomach is suddenly full of butterflies. I stare at him speechless and he lays a soft kiss on my forehead then another on my cheek to wrap up with a chaste kiss on my lips. If he wasn't holding me tight, I would have passed out of excitement. He caresses my hair and back. I'm still unable to say a word. My brain has lost control of my body and my heart is at full speed.

After what it feels like years to me, Edward releases me and heads to his car. I'm still breathless and I can't manage to say a word. I watch numb as Edward drives away.

I'm looking at what it seems to be my twin sister in the mirror. She has a big grin on her face, she's glowing. I am considering not washing my face anymore. I can still feel Edward's lips on my own. They felt soft. My first kiss, I wouldn't have thought it would happen in front of my house. Nor less that it would be with such a specimen.

I don't think I'll be able to sleep. I'm overly excited and my mind is recreating that joyful moment over and over. My first kiss with Edward Cullen.

_**A/N: Thank you for reading. Please review, I can't wait to hear about your thoughts on this chapter and my story.**_


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

**_Edward's POV_**

_To love, or not to love: that is the question._

The movie was alright, it's been a long time since I'd been to a cinema. I had forgotten the sticky floor, the dim emergency light, the constant chatter of people; but it was all worth it. Bella seemed to be studying me during the entire movie, I pretended not to notice. I wasn't sure if I was going to have a good time, not because of Bella but because of her friends. They seemed intrigued when Bella showed up with me. I could tell the girls were thrilled, the boys not so much.

After the movie we went to a burger shop. I ordered the house special, but I couldn't tell what was special about it. It seemed to be like another burger, but the boys were devouring it, maybe they were starving or maybe they lack taste buds. I didn't want to be rude, so I ate the entire burger. Bella seemed to hate the food too, she barely touched her burger. I have to make sure she eats more. I thought we were leaving early, but Bella's friends have other plans in mind. They are absorbed with each other's mouths. It's a gross spectacle to witness.

Bella starts talking this time, I can tell she's not enjoying the show either. We decide to go out and wait for the others; we sit down on the sidewalk. For a moment I thought I saw Elena behind some bushes. But I know that is not possible, she's dead. We used to go out at night and walked in the park holding hands. A shiver passes by my neck every time that I remember her; it's like if I could still feel her touch on my skin. A moment later I noticed that I'm really not alone, Bella is by my side and she's looking at me bewildered. I just smiled at her and start talking about today's assembly. I tell her that in my previous school there weren't as many students as in Forks High School. It still hurts to talk about my past and Bella seems to have noticed it because she starts talking about music. She doesn't have a favorite group; she seems to enjoy music in general. I tell her that I play the piano and that I write melodies as well. Bella's cell phone rings at the beat of a popular song; I've heard it before but I don't know its name.

Things don't sound good between Bella and the mysterious caller. Panic has taken her smile away. I can hear someone shouting at the other end of the phone, but I'm not sure if it's a man or a woman. Finally the call ends and I ask Bella if everything is alright; she says her mom wants her to get home right now. From what Bella says her parents sound like they are strict with her. I will never complain about my parents again.

She offers to ask Eric to drive me home, but after what I've heard over the phone, I can't let her go like that. She's shaken and it's late, besides I don't want to stay with her friends. She seems reluctant to accept any help, so I tell her that she would be helping me to learn all the shortcuts in town.

Bella goes inside the restaurant and says good-bye to her friends; I stand behind her and nod. We are heading home now. I'm not used to sitting in the passenger seat and Bella's driving skills make me questioned my sanity. I should have taken control and volunteered to drive. I tell Bella my address and she looks amazed, but doesn't say a word.

I decide to remain silent until we reach my house. I don't want to end up wrapped around a tree. We finally get to my house. I tell Bella I will follow her to her house, she doesn't seem happy with the idea but I give her no choice. I run to my car and drive up behind Bella's truck. I've never worried for someone like I worried about Bella; her health, her driving. I've barely known her, but something is pulling me toward her.

We finally reach her house and I get out of my car to open her door. My mother has taught me that chivalry is a man's way of showing concern and respect. I noticed that Bella doesn't live that far from me, so I offer to pick her up on my way to school. Instantly Bella's face goes pale, I can tell I caught her out of her element. I add that we could help the environment if we only use one car. She seems to relax a bit, but she's not convinced. Then I tell her that she can save some money and I could learn some shortcuts to save gas; she agrees. Bella locks her truck and something inside me tells me that I shouldn't do what I'm about to do, but I can't help myself.

I hold Bella by her waist and turn her around to face me. She smells of jasmine and cherries, it's so inviting. I can't help it anymore. I've been attracted to her as a child is attracted to candy. I kiss her on her forehead then on her cheek and finally I kiss her on the lips. I slide my hand through her hair and across her back. Her skin is soft. I don't want to let go of her. We're standing so close to each other that I can feel her heart beating fast like the wings of a hummingbird. I don't want her to faint so I release her. She seems to be unable to speak and I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. Maybe she is disgusted, maybe she expected more or maybe she is ecstatic. I choose to think it's the last one.

I head home thinking of Bella, she's bewitched me and I'm more than willing to be under her spell. I didn't think it was possible for me to love again, but here I am another victim of cupid. I get home and find Alice in the living room, the white in her eyes has been replaced with tormented red. She's been crying. As soon as she sees me, she runs to pull me into a hug and rest her head on my chest. Her breathing is uneven; I soothed her rubbing her back trying to comfort her. She finally speaks and I wish she hadn't. The room twists around me as I hear the words: "Grandma's dead". The world crumbles around me and we both collapse to the floor.

_**A/N: Thank you for reading and reviewing. I'm glad to know that you're enjoying my story. **_

_**Thanks to my friend Chase Corin for being the beta of this chapter.**_


	9. Chapter 9

**Bella's POV**  
_"The sad truth is we are all missing someone and we are hoping they are missing us too." -Unknown_

**Chapter 9**

I woke up with a big smile on my face. Last night was the best night of my life. I felt complete with Edward and he seemed to feel the same. Now I understand what everybody talks about, love is like a drug and I want more. I want more of Edward; he makes me forget about my problems. I've never been so happy. My stomach grumbles and I am not sure if it's because I'm hungry or because I'm excited. I take a shower and choose to wear jeans and a purple blouse, I love how purple looks on me, it enhances my hair color.

I'm running late so I just grab some hot pockets and dig in on my way to school. I don't know why I'm feeling super excited; I know that it was just a kiss, maybe Edward was carried away, maybe that's how he says good-bye to people. I have to stop feeling like this, but more importantly I have to find out if there's really a future with Edward.

When I get to school I look for his car, it's nowhere to be seen; maybe he came to school with his sister. Classes pass slowly, I want to see Edward; I want to talk to him. At lunch I expect to see him or catch a glace of Alice, but neither of them is in the cafeteria. Jessica and Angela have been asking all kind of questions about Edward. I don't feel comfortable telling them all the details, and I still have to find out if it was the heat of the moment that led him to kiss me or if he really meant it. Finally I have Spanish, I hurry thru the corridors. To my disappointment Edward isn't in Spanish either. What started as a great day is now becoming more and more frustrating, I'm sure that there's a good reason why he's not in school, but still I wish I could talk to him.

As I walk to my truck an idea crosses my mind. I get in my truck and head to Edward's house. Sure it makes me look like an eager, overprotective stalker. I wrack my brain for a good reason to drive to his house. I could always say that Señor Molina gave more information about the project, in the end Edward is my project partner, so it makes sense that I visit him with this information, _Right? Yeah that sounds good._

When I reach The Cullen's house and my heart feels as if it is about to explode, I've never been so nervous before. _Relax Bella, everything will be ok_. I take a deep breath and ring the doorbell twice. I wait and wait but no one comes to the door, I try to see thru the window but it's hard to see anything. I walk around the house and it seems that no one is in it. The house looks more stunning at daylight than how it looked at night, it has big windows, and the view is spectacular. I can't imagine how it would feel to wake up every day looking at the blue sky and breathing the fantastic aroma of nature and sunlight here.

I head home disappointed because I was really expecting to see Edward, my heart sinks, but I tell myself that I have to be strong and not let this affect me. The radio is not helping me either. I wonder if today is the day for sad songs because all the radio stations I tune in are playing depressing songs.

Mom is not home and dad is still at the conference so I have the house for myself. I turn on the computer and check my e-mail which is full of spam and nothing interesting. I decide to refocus and start working on my homework. I go to bed early thankful that my parents haven't come; I'm not in the mood to argue. I'm still concerned about Edward, what could have happened that made him and his family leave town. I just hope is nothing serious.

_I dream of flowers and sunny skies. A mansion hidden in the woods, people coming and going; they all seem lost in sorrow. I see four figures standing out of the chaos, they are wearing matching outfits. Black robes clung in their bodies, I can tell they are all related, the same porcelain touch on their skins, the same posture and gracefulness as they walk toward me. I can barely see their faces, they are covered with a hood coming from their robes. I feel my heart racing and I start walking backwards something about them make me shiver. They appear to be floating now, they are fast. I start running trying to escape but fall hard._ I wake up with a scream, my heart is really beating wildly and I look at the alarm clock, it's 2 a.m., I'm sweating and scared. I tell myself that it was just a dream, they're not real. I have nothing to be afraid of. I'm too charged up to try to sleep again, so I decide to turn on my laptop, I check for new messages, but nothing comes up. I'm disappointed. I'm not sure what I was expecting to find, if Edward and his family left Forks suddenly, it had to be a good reason. I check my cell phone for new messages or missed calls, but there's nothing.

I must have fallen sleep after checking my cell phone, the alarm clock tells me that it's 7 a.m., I take a shower and get clean clothes. I take my customary hot pockets and drive to school. Today we have the seniors' assembly with the Principal, Edward must be there. I'm really expecting to see him. The day passes so fast, and there's no sign of Edward and his sister. He isn't at the cafeteria, and never made it to the assembly. I send him a message asking if everything's alright. I wait and stare at my cell phone and get no reply. I wish I had Alice's number so I could ask her if Edward is okay. Angela sees my concern and nudges me; I just smile and put my phone aside.

The weekend comes and I haven't heard from Edward. I'm beginning to fear that his father was transfer back to Europe; I feel a stab hits my heart every time that I think of Edward. It all happened too fast but it felt real. But if it was real and the feelings were mutual, wouldn't he try to contact me? What if it wasn't real? No, I can't continue to think about it. Why when everything feels alright life has to turn against me and hit me where it hurts the most? I don't think my heart can handle more disappointments. To make things worst mom and dad are arguing again, their fights are becoming louder and physical. Yesterday night I even heard something crash against the floor. I always thought my parents were a decent couple -except for the part where they hit me and say nasty things to me- but overall they have been together for nineteen years. I don't even know why they're yelling about, a part of me feels glad that I'm not the center of their anger, but another part feels guilty of thinking that. I want the best for them, but if their fights escalate to another level, I'm afraid something bad would happen.

I can't stay in my room another minute, so I take my keys and head to the mall. I'm not really a person that enjoys shopping but window shopping helps me relax and forget about the things happening around me, my parents arguing every second, Edward's disappearance, and graduation. There're many things to worry about. I find myself in the food court; I guess my stomach drove me here. I'm carrying my lunch to an empty table when I see a familiar face. I let the tray fall onto the floor, I can't believe my eyes.

_**Author Notes**:_ I want to thank my friend Ineke for creating the amazing banner for the story. I would also like to thank my friend Chase Corin for being my beta for this chapter. And last but not least I want to thank you for reading my story. Please review and comment, I'd be happy to hear from you.

You can follow me on twitter at MsSadkittycat


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

**Bella's POV**

"_Dreaming or awake, we perceive only events that have meaning to us." -Jane Roberts_

Edward is all laughs with a beautiful blond girl; I feel my eyes filling with tears. That explains it all, his disappearance, his lack of attention and affection. Of course, _what was I thinking?_ I was a fool for thinking Edward could love me. It was impossible that a guy like him would fall in love with a girl like me. We're two complete opposites, he's the day and I'm the night. It would have never worked. I feel betrayed, I feel numb; I start walking away not bothering with cleaning the food I left behind. My appetite's lost.

It wasn't easy to drive with soaking eyes and a wounded heart but I managed to get to my house. I head to my room and lock the door. I curled up in my bed crying. I haven't cried like this in ages. It feels good to let it all out, but crying is not helping. I take a bath; the smell of jasmine and cherries is reassuring. I close my eyes; the foam around my body makes me think I'm lying on clouds. It's calming and peaceful, I could stay like this forever. I see images of people twirling around me, faces that I recognized easily, my grandparents, teachers, classmates, neighbors then I new set of faces fill my mind they're perfect, flawless, beautiful; the Cullen family. Edward's is the last that I see before falling into nothingness. What was calming and peaceful is now turbulent and painful, I feel cold stakes lancing through my body. _Can someone make this stop?_

I'm awake by the beeping of machines near me. I don't understand what's going on, I don't remember what happened. I open my eyes and find myself surrounded by machines and tubes. This is definitely not heaven. My head feels fluffy; my throat hurts and feels stiff. I try to speak and realized a tube is located in my mouth down my throat. I feel desperate; I try to move but realized my hands are trapped to the bed. It doesn't make sense, why would they do that? It's not like I'd committed a crime, I don't even know why I'm here. I try to remember what happened. _Think Bella, think harder. _The last thing I remembered is being in the bathtub grazing my skin with a sponge. From my experience of watching medical shows, I know there's a button near the patient's hand to call for assistance. I try to look for it, but it's hard to move my neck with the tube in my throat, so I just brush my fingers on the bed until I find what I was looking for. I click it twice; nothing happens. I count to ten and click it again and still no answer. Maybe is broken. Suddenly a nurse enters the room and look at me with concerned eyes. She calls my name and tells me she will page the doctor.

The doctor arrived to the room and checked my vitals; he even lit my eyes with a flashlight. I just blinked one time for yes and twice for no. He told me they had to stuck a tube down my throat to help me breathe; he said he will do some tests to check if I was able to breathe on my own, he didn't use those exact words, but that's what I understood. There are so many questions that I want to ask, but I am unable to speak, I feel trap on my body. I guess I started panicking because the machines are beeping faster and faster. Doctor Paul Lahote, _as I later found out was his name_, tells me to relax and calm down. How can he expect me to relax if I am unable to communicate with him! He gives the nurse instructions and she goes out of the room hastily. Seconds later she appears in the room and handles a vial and a syringe to the doctor, he takes them and passes the liquid to the syringe then to the IV down my arm. I start to feel bubbly and my eyelids seem to weight a ton, I try to fight the anesthesia but I fail miserably.

I don't know how many hours have passed, but the orangey tones on my window tell me the sun is saying good-bye to the day. I hear some voices on the corridor next to my room, they are familiar voices.

_-Is she awake doctor?_ – That's my mom, she sounds concerned-

-_She will be in a couple of minutes; I had to sedate her to calm her down._

_-Does she know what happened? Is she able to breathe on her own? _–My dad sounds more concerned than my mother.

_-She will get better; we have to run some tests to see if she can be unplugged from the ventilator._ –What does that mean? I can breathe on my own, right?

I hear someone opening the door, I close my eyes. I cannot bear to see my parents, not until I know what exactly happened to me.

_-Oh, Bella! Sweetheart_ –my mom can't handle it and she starts to cry. I feel a nudge on my heart, she doesn't break easily; I must look worse than what I imagined. She continues to speak _–When are you going to unbind her? Is it really necessary?_

_-Renée_ –My dad cuts in- _The doctor already explained us, she has to be restrained until she speaks to a shrink, and she has a lot explaining to do._

-_You can't really believe what they say, she couldn't…_ -My mom starts to sob

_-You saw her Renée; if we had arrived any later she would have…_

_-Stop Charlie! Don't say it._ –The pain in my mom's voice is tangible. I can't make sense of what they're saying, it doesn't compute, what is going on?

_- I'm sorry Doctor Lahote, the chief is expecting you in his office_. –That must have to be the nurse.

_-I'll be right there Ann. Mr. and Mrs. Swan I have to go for now, page me if you need anything._

_-We will, thank you doctor._ The doctor leaves the room.

My parents stay in the room, my dad seems to be walking in circles; his heavy steps give him away. A ring startles him. My mom talks now _–It's that Cullen boy again, what should I tell him? He's been calling every hour checking on Bella. He'll worry if I don't answer him._

_-I didn't even know that Bella had other friends than her high school friends._

_- He's from her class, he's new though._

_-I know. They're new in town, I don't trust him Renée_. –The phone stops ringing. _Problem solved, he'll become desperate soon enough or he'll finally understand we don't want to speak to him._

How did Edward get my mom's cell phone number? Does he know I'm in the hospital? Why does he care? He seemed happy with that girl at the mall. Tears threaten to fall down my cheeks. Mom seems to realize that and caresses my cheeks. _–Sweetheart, are you in pain? Charlie, she's crying, call the doctor._

Dad goes out the room, I open my eyes and regret it immediately, my mom is crying, she has dark circles around her eyes, either she hasn't sleep a lot or she has been crying or both.

"It's alright sweetheart, the doctor we'll be right here." She thinks I'm crying because I'm in pain, but the truth is I'm crying because of Edward, my heart aches every time I think of him.

The doctor enters the room and asks my parents to step back, the nurse gets in with some instruments. Doctor Lahote tells me he's going to remove the ventilator and that I need to cough. I do it and immediately feel the familiar emptiness in my throat. I'm advised to not try to speak yet as my vocal cords may be swollen. The nurse holds an ice cube on my lips she tells me to swallow the liquid, it feels good.

Night has come and I recall all the events of the day in my head, it feels bizarre to be experiencing all these moments. My parents' look of relief when the doctor told them I'll have a complete recovery. The amazing sensation of breathing, I will never take it for granted.

I found out that I have been in the hospital for one day; I still don't remember how I got here, but one thing is certain now, they think I tried to kill myself, but this time I didn't try to end my life, did I? The last thing I remember is being in the bathtub and then closing my eyes seeing all the familiar faces in my head. I'm still tied to the bed, they won't release me until I convince them that I really didn't try to kill myself, it was an accident. Is that why Edward's been calling my mom, does he think I try to kill myself? And what worries me the most is that if Edward knows what happened to me, does it mean the entire school knows it too?

* * *

I'm being released of the hospital after four days of therapy, psychoanalysis and the constant nagging of my parents; at least their stress has eased in the last two days. My room is full of balloons and cards, flowers are not allowed. I haven't had time to find out who sent them; the nurse has been thoughtful and packed the cards so I could read them on my way home. I feel guilty of not remembering her name.

I can't believe how young Doctor Lahote really is, and on the last days I have realized how handsome he is, his light caramel skin, his dark brown eyes surrounded by thick eyelashes, the blush on his cheeks every time he got near me, his toned body… I'm carried away every time I think of him. He's so playful and makes me smile, being with him makes me forget about the days to come; they're going to be hard, I'll have to give a lot explanations to everybody especially Jessica, she always want to find out about everything.

I'm forced to leave my room in a wheelchair, but on the good side Doctor Lahote is the one pushing me, he's so gentile and he offers to carry me to the car, but I tell him I can walk, so he offers me his arm and I hold tight to him, we say good-bye and he brushes his arm down my spine. I blush immediately, but when we break apart I see him blushing too.

We got home and had lunch together. Both of my parents took days off while I was hospitalized. They are being very attentive and caring, a part of me is waiting for them to become rude at any point, but another part hopes they won't. I'm in my bed checking the cards. They're from different people, relatives I barely see, neighbors, classmates. They all wish me to recover soon. Angela's card is touching; I couldn't have expected less from her as she's my closest yet distant friend. We're not that attached to each other as other BFF's. I guess we have been friend for a long time because we don't hover. Jessica's card seems to be a carbon copy of a Hallmark get well card; we're not that close after all. At the end of the bag there's a small purple box, I don't remember seen it before. I open it and find a pair of crystal droplets earrings. They are beautiful and simple, I try to find a card, something that tells me who sent them, but the only letters I can read are "E.M." I don't know someone with those initials. At first I thought it was a mistake, but on the back of the box I found a paper that says my name handwritten in an old fashion way. I'm taken out of my reverie when I heard Charlie yelling downstairs, I hurry to see what the matter is and freeze as I recognize the person standing in front of my father.

_**A/N: **Thank you for reading. Hope to hear from you._

_Thanks to the beta for this chapter Chase Corin, thanks for your help._


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: **

I'm sorry for not updating the story before, I had an accident and I haven't been feeling good.

Thank you for your reviews/favorites I appreciate each one of them; I always reply unless they are anonyms... I can't reply to those.

I also want to thank Chase Corin for being my beta reader and my friend.

**Chapter 11**

Edward is at my front door, he looks tormented and frail; Charlie is still yelling at him. For what I can hear Edward wants to see me and Charlie is not happy about it. Renée settles next to my dad, she's trying to reason with him. Edward says that he can come another day, but Charlie is not having it either. They continue discussing in a more civilized manner. Finally Renée says the decision should be mine. She starts walking towards the stairs, I duck and hurry to my room.

Renée knocks on my door and I go and open it. I act surprised when she tells me the news of my unexpected visitor. She makes it clear that Edward is an eye-candy and that I should talk to him if I want to. My heart speaks for me and I agree to go downstairs. As we approach the front door I see Edward take a deep breath, Charlie leads him to the living room and Renée and I follow them. Both Edward and I look bewildered as it's obvious that Renée and Charlie don't plan to leave us alone. Edward is sitting in the armchair and I'm trapped between my parents. The tension in the room is palpable, no one says a word until Edward greets me and tells me that I look great; at that Charlie stifles and Renée looks beyond herself. I just thank him for his remarks, there're many things I wish to ask him, but I'm not able to say them in front of my parents. Edward seems to be struggling with what to say. He finally says that Señor Molina has given more information about the project; apparently he sent an e-mail during the week, which makes me realize that I have to catch up with all the homework. Edward seems to have read my mind and he offers to give me notes from all the classes I missed, Charlie and Renée consent with that and schedule for Edward to come during the weekend to my house, if his parents agree with that. He tells my parents that it shouldn't be a problem.

My parents thank him for his help, they shake hands and say good-bye and Edward has no other choice but to do the same with me, since Charlie is right beside me and not willing to move. I feel an electric shock when we shook hands, we both react to it and smile. We all walk Edward to the door and he nods as a farewell.

* * *

Edward arrives to my house the next morning; he's all business. We start working as soon as he gets, he just greets me warmly with a big smile on his face; I don't know what I was expecting but I feel disappointed. A part of me wants to hold him tight and never let him go, but another part wants to yell at him.

The day passes quickly, Edward and I haven't had time to talk about things other than school because either Charlie or Renée remain nearby. After some hours they seem to be at ease and decide to leave us alone to visit my dad's best friend Billy Black. We continue studying for some minutes, the tension in the room is palpable.

We both start talking at the same time, Edward lets me start but I'm too emotional to talk and I start crying. Edward wipes my tears away with his fingers, they feel like feathers against my wet skin; he hugs me tight and we stay like this for what it seems eternity. We are made for each other. I can feel his heartbeat, its steadiness calms me, his breathe warms every part of me; even though I know this is perfection and that I couldn't ask for anything else, I still need to know who was the girl that was with Edward at the mall and most importantly are they romantically involved? I don't know how to ask this, but I have to know the truth. I turn away from Edward and begin with the inquisition.

"Edward, there's something I need to ask you and I need you to be honest with me."

"Sure, what do you want to know?" He's so at ease and I'm a bundle of nerves.

"Why did you disappear after we went to the movies? Where were you?" Edward takes a long time to answer, he's pensive.

"I've forgotten about that. I'm sorry for disappearing without notice, it's was unexpected." I can tell he's gloomy. Now I remember he wasn't the only one leaving the town, his family was missing too.

"You don't need to apologize. I was just worried for you, what happened?" Edward starts to sob and his eyes are filling with tears. _What have I done?_ I didn't imagine it was too serious, now I feel bad for starting this. I try to soothe him, but he signals for me to stop.

"My grandma died. We had to arrange everything for her funeral, there was not time to spare. We just had time to pack and gather a few things. We left early morning to Chicago and met with the rest of our family; I hadn't seen them in a while. It seems you only see your relatives in funerals or weddings. Two opposite emotions are at play, and both of them end with people hugging each other and crying." Edward has managed to arrange himself, he's not longer sobbing and the tears that threatened to fall off his eyes have left his lower lashes wet and bright. I have no words to say, I am terrible at comforting people. I just rub his back as a signal of support. I can relate to what he's feeling, losing a loved one can be devastating. I know I felt that way when my grandparents died, it happened years ago but I still miss them so much.

"Edward, I'm really sorry. I wish I had known." That's all I manage to say.

"It's fine Bella, I'm the one who's sorry for disappearing like that. We left in such a hurry that I forgot to pack my laptop and my cell phone's charger. I had no way to contact you. And then we came back along with my cousins and I had no time to call you. And when I did call you, your mom answered the phone and told me what had happened to you. My whole world came to an end; I thought I had lost you. My biggest regret was not telling you how I felt for you, how much I loved you" At that point Edward and I are crying, he was trying so hard not to cry while saying those words. We are now embracing. I can feel and taste the salty water from our tears while we kiss with such passion. This is what we needed, the outlet for our pain. After some minutes we both gasp for air but we're still hugging and breathing hastily.

"You said you _loved_ me. Do you still feel that way after all that happened with me?"

"Not really" I literally feel the world shaking as he says those words. "That didn't sound right. Let me rephrase it. What I meant is that I love you more now. Thinking that I had lost you made me realize how deeply in love I am with you Bella. I know it sounds crazy to have such strong feelings for a person you've only know for a few days, but it's true, I'm deeply in love with you."

I take a deep breath and gather what is left of my guts to say what I'm about to say. _He loves me, he really loves me._ "That does sound crazy. But if love makes us say and do crazy things, sign me up to the madhouse right now; because I'm deeply in love with you too." We start kissing more passionate than before. My whole body is on fire, it's like I have a fever or something and I like it. If I'm sick, I want a full dose of Edward to get better. Edward's hands are hesitant while they explore my body. My body reacts to his touch and I'm trembling, I feel like passing out. I need to catch a breath. We both seem to need a break to breathe. I've never kissed someone like that, in fact, I've only make out with Edward.

Kissing can be exhausting but the exhaustion is fleeting. We are now in the kitchen grabbing something to eat and drink. Luckily for us, there are leftovers from last night's dinner, chicken parmesan. I'm an expert in cooking leftovers and we are eating in a couple of minutes. I decide to break the awkward post-making out silence. "Are your cousins in town or have they left already?"

"No, they left a couple of days ago. I think you would have liked them, especially Tanya."

"I would have liked to meet them. Did they have a good time in Forks?"

"I believe so. We didn't have a lot of time together. They spent most of their time with Alice shopping and gossiping about the boys they like."

"So you didn't take them anywhere?"

"What kind of host do you think I am? It wouldn't have been nice to ignore them. After all, I don't see them often."

"You haven't answered my question; did you go out with them?"

"Yes and no. I mean, I went out with Tanya to the mall. She said she wanted to talk to me alone, but I believe she was just looking for an excuse to avoid Alice's shopping spree."

It's all starting to make sense. It never occurred to me that the beautiful blond girl could be related to Edward. "I can understand that, your sister is a little whirlwind, isn't she?" I can't help but giggle, Alice is really something to watch out. Edward giggles too and comments "I wouldn't say little, I would say she's a tornado coming at full speed; but once you known her, she's really something special. I hope she didn't scare you when you met her."

"No, she didn't. I think she's really a great person and she really cares for you."

"Now that we've discussed my disappearance, would you tell me what really happened to you?"

I guess I owe him an explanation after all. "Well, I was taking a bath and apparently I felt asleep and I would have drawn if my parents hadn't arrived in time" I'm trying to be as honest as I can, besides the shrink I haven't talked to anyone about what happened that day; I'm not even sure of what occurred. Edward seems to be pondering what I've just said. "What did you think had happened Edward?"

"There have been some rumors about that day. Some say you tried to kill yourself, others say that it was an accident. People have really strong opinions about you."

"What did you believe?" I knew there was going to be controversy about me and that dreadful day, but I never thought what Edward may think about me. His opinion is important to me.

"I believed in believing nothing as they say until I heard directly from you. You're the only one I could trust."

"That means a lot to me. I can't imagine how things will be tomorrow in school. I am terrified about how people at school are going to react."

"There's nothing to fear Bella, I will be standing next to you. I won't let anything bad happen to you. In fact, I want to be your official drive to school if that's ok with you."

"I… I… I think I'll have to check with my parents." There, that should be an acceptable answer. I was just caught by surprise, I wasn't expecting that offer.

"Sure, check with them. I guess I should go now. It's getting dark and my parents are probably wondering why I'm not home yet."

That wasn't what I wanted to hear, but I deserved it. I want to spend every moment of my life with him, but I am really not sure about how my parents would react if Edward comes tomorrow to pick me up for school.

"I get it. I appreciate your help; I don't know what I would have done without it." Edward starts packing his belongings and I want to stop him and ask him to stay longer, but I know he's right. I don't want his parents to worry about him. I don't even want to imagine if something bad were to happen to him because he was driving at a late hour.

"I guess I've got everything now."

We head to the door and I'm about to say good-bye when he suddenly holds me against him and kiss me on the lips. This time our kiss ends too quickly to my dismay. It seems that I'm not the only one that's having a hard time saying good-bye.

"I'm glad you liked the earrings. I knew they would look great on you." I forgot I was wearing them.

"I'm sorry for not thanking you before; I didn't know who had given them to me. I really like them."

"Really? I guess I forgot to include my name. They belonged to my grandmother."

"Edward, that's a nice gesture. But wouldn't your grandmother like them to stay in your family. Maybe Alice or your mom would like to have them." I start to remove the earrings but Edward stops me and says "Bella, my grandmother left lots of nice souvenirs for Alice and my mom. She wanted me to give them to someone special. You are more than special to me. They belong to you now as well as my heart. I know you may think I'm being silly for doing this, but it's the truth. You own my heart Bella, I've never thought I'd love someone as deeply as I love you. I've known that since the moment I first saw you. I thought my heart was long gone, but you've brought it to life again Bella." I'm speechless; I didn't know I had that effect on him. "Edward, I don't think you're silly. That's the most beautiful thing someone has said to me." I'm crying now but for the first time, I'm crying tears of joy. The moment is broken as Charlie gets to the porch and punches Edward in his face.

**Final Notes: **

I'm currently working in Chapter 12 hope to be updating the story next week.

Please don't hesitate to comment/PM me if you have any questions about the story, I'll be glad to answer them.

If you're a mother I wish you a **Happy Mother's Day!** If you're not a mother yet, I hope you have a lovely time with your mom and family. If you don't have your mother with you anymore hope you remember the lovely times you enjoyed with her.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: This is one of my favorite chapters :') **

* * *

**Bella's POV**

**Chapter 12**

I've never seen Charlie so furious, for the first time I'm afraid he's lost his marbles. Mom and I try to stop him but he seems determine to use Edward as his punching bag. I'm not even sure why he's hitting Edward. "Dad, dad stop! Please stop it." Mom is frantic too. "Charlie, please stop; what are you doing?"

Edward is having a hard time, obviously he doesn't want to hurt Charlie but he's trying his best to defend himself. We finally managed to separate them. Edward's nose and mouth are covered with blood; I help him to stand up. I run to the kitchen and gather some paper towels to stop the hemorrhage. Mom and dad are in the living room, she's trying to calm him down. I head towards Edward and I'm stopped by my parents. Dad is a bit frantic and asks me if I'm ok, he tells me he doesn't want Edward to hurt me. He blames Edward for the bath incident. I try to explain him that Edward hasn't hurt me in any form; that I was just crying of happiness. Then I head to the porch where Edward is still trying to stop the blood loss with his jacket. I sit down next to him and hand him the paper towels, I help him to get clean. Luckily he's wearing a dark shirt so there's not a visible drop of blood. I worry that his nose is broken, but he assures me it's in perfect form. I can't find words to apologize for the incident. He tells me that I shouldn't worry, it wasn't my fault. He thinks that my dad thought that he had said or done something to upset me and that his instinct was to protect me. I tell him that's exactly what Charlie told me, but that I'm still shocked of his reaction.

Edward's cell phone rings and he answers the call. I hear as he explains that he was just saying good-bye to me and that he was caught up helping me studying. Then he stands up and tells me he's feeling better now and that his parents were making sure he was on his way home. I tell him that I'll take care of his jacket, he agrees. He doesn't want his parents asking questions about the blood on his jacket. He says he'll think of an explanation for his swollen lip. He doesn't look that bad, he does have a puffy lip and the skin around his nose, cheeks and lips is getting purplish. I tell him he could put a pack of frozen green peas to help with the swelling, he agrees and I run to the kitchen to grab the cold package. On my way out I'm escorted by my parents I instantly become protective and stand between them and Edward. Charlie is trying his best to apologize with Edward, he tells him his paternal instincts kicked in when he saw me crying and that he must have found out what was going on before striking Edward. They both shake hands. I'm left alone with Edward and I hand him the frozen peas. I apologize for a zillion time, Edward puts his finger on my lips and shakes his head. He says he would have reacted the same way if he saw his daughter crying next to a guy he barely knows.

I walk Edward to his car and we hug and kiss, this time Edward is the one to put an end to our kiss. He's still hurting. I feel really bad and I wish I could make him feel better. I watch as he goes into the road.

I go to my room and check that I have everything set for school. As I'm getting ready to sleep, my cell phone beeps and I check the incoming message: _Thank you for a remarkable day. It's definitely one of my favorites. But there's something I'm regretting._

I'm concern about what he's regretting is it kissing me, giving me his grandma's earrings, coming to my house or all of the above? I hit reply: _It was undeniably an interesting day. I've never had a day like this. What is it that you're regretting?_

I stare at the cell phone wishing they had invented a real time body transfer device, so I could be in the same room with Edward and see his expression. At the same time I'm thankful they haven't invented a machine like that because I fear to see his features, what if he's regretting coming to my house or what is worst, what if he wishes he hadn't kissed me. I'll die if he feels that way. But I tell myself is time to pop out of my fantasy world and start thinking clearly. I could never be with someone like Edward. Things like that only happen in books and movies. There's not a charming prince waiting for me out there. And the fact that he hasn't replied tells me he's really considering his actions. I curl up in bed and close my eyes as I close them my cell phone beeps and I tell myself I should be strong and not read the message, I could still pretend I've found my bright and shiny knight. Yes, I could still have a perfect night and dream with that.

* * *

I'm awake by the alarm and grudgingly head to the bathroom to shower. Nothing like the warm water running thru my skin to start the day.

As I comb my hair, I remember I hadn't read the last message. I dread to read what it says, but I check it anyway: _I think you should hear it and not just read it. I'll pick you up at 7:40. Won't be able to sleep until I see you._

Crap! I've forgotten about that, I look at my watch and realize is 7:30. I check myself in the mirror and add the finishing touches to my outfit. I look very pale, I can't wait for Spring to come. I apply some blush and lip gloss; that should do it. I run downstairs and heat some hot pockets on the microwave; I grab some orange juice from the fridge and pack everything on my bag. I walk to the porch and wait for Edward. He arrives just in time. I was expecting him to come on his Volvo but he's driving a stunning car, I've seen that type of car in magazines. It's definitely more expensive than the Volvo. And miraculously I recognized the blue and white triangles surrounded by a black circle with the initials BMW. It's a black sports car, Edward looks astonishing behind the steering wheel. He goes out of the car and opens the passenger door for me. I saunter to the car and greet Edward before getting in. I appreciate small gestures like this. Chivalry is an effective way to turn me on.

On our way to school we keep quiet most of the time. I like the music we're listening, I'm glad I recognize the majority of songs being played. We have a similar taste in music and that makes me glow even more. As we get closer to school, my heart is thumping franticly against my chest cavity. I feel my mouth getting dry and my hands are very cold. Edward stops the car right after we enter the school's parking lot. He's staring at me with piercing gray eyes, I feel that his gaze can rip through me. Finally, he speaks "There's nothing to worry Bella, I'm right beside you. I'll never let any bad happen to you, never doubt that." I have never felt protected or loved; Edward makes me feel that way. He's too good to be real "I know and I thank you for everything you've done for me. I have no way to give back a fragment of what you've given me." I try to ease the moment and tell him "You have a great taste in cars. They are fantastic." He still looks concern but he chuckles anyway "Bella, you don't have to return me any favor. It's been my way to thank you for bringing light to my life. You have no idea of what you mean for me and that brings me to continue our pending conversation."

I've forgotten about that, what could he be regretting? "As I told you last night there's something I regret from yesterday."

"Yes, I remember you mentioned it. What are you regretting?"

"I'm regretting not behaving like a gentleman with you, I shouldn't have kissed you like that." My biggest fear comes true, I knew it was too good to be true.

"Then, I'm regretting not behaving like a lady. I should have stopped you when you first kissed me."

"I don't regret kissing you, that was an important factor in making yesterday one of my favorite days. I do regret not asking you to be my girlfriend, I should have asked you that before kissing you." _He wants me to be his girlfriend? _I've never had a boyfriend before; I had thought it wasn't meant for me. He gently smoothes his fingers against my face, then he turns and grabs something from the back seat. Out of nowhere he takes a bouquet of lilies and jasmine. Once again he has left me speechless. He holds the bouquet in one hand and with the other hand he continues to stroke my face "I thought that I was alone and lost in the world. I was a wanderer heading nowhere, but you've become the compass I needed in my life; and for that I'm grateful. I know that I'm being selfish. I don't deserve you in my life, but it would make me very happy if you granted me the honor of being your boyfriend." I can't help but crying as I hear him saying those beautiful words. I thought I was the one being selfish, I thought I was the one wandering senseless every day. I didn't know I could mean something to someone. I hug him close to me and caress his hair with my hand, he smells wonderful. I suddenly feel my neck getting damp by the tears coming from his eyes. We get apart a few inches enough for me to see his face clearly. He looks beyond himself, he is expecting my answer. "You're not the only one that needed comfort and clarity. You are so dear to me and you make me feel safe and happy, and no one has made me feel that way before. So at the risk of being selfish it would be my honor to be your girlfriend." He brings me closer to him and caresses my hair, then he kisses me tenderly on my lips. I'm intoxicated with Edward, I want more of him. I stroke his hair with my hands, it feels like if I were touching clouds; it's so soft, so silky. I feel bubbly and chirpy. I've never thought I'd behave like this with a boy. I leave behind his hair, now my hands are moving toward his back. He's so firm I can feel his muscles flexing, suddenly I move my hands to his chest. It's hard and soft at the same time… Even with his jacket on I can feel each one of his abs, my hand is en route to his navel. He notices where I'm heading and I gasp at his reaction.

* * *

**A/N: **Thank you for reading my story. Each follow, favorite, review makes me happy and encourages me to keep writing.

What POV would you like to read next? Bella's or Edward's? Please review or PM with your answer.


	13. Chapter 13

_**A/N: **Thank you for your comments, messages, favorites and follows. You've chosen Edward's POV for this chapter, there's a special surprise at the end._

* * *

**Chapter 13**

**Edward's POV**

Seeing Bella wearing my grandmother's earrings made me very happy. I knew they'll go perfectly on her. She has that classical beauty and elegance. At first I wasn't sure if she'll like them, but I knew Bella was the one I wanted to see with them. I wish my grandmother and Bella had met, I'm sure they'd have liked each other right away.

How can a devastating moment end in happiness? My grandma's death left me brokenhearted. I felt my whole world revolting and breaking into tiny pieces and to make things worse, I found out in my return that Bella was hospitalized and under life support. I regretted not saying good-bye to my grandma and I wasn't prepared to relive that emotion with Bella. Thank heavens I didn't have to go through that process again. I don't know what I'd have done without Bella.

I said I'd never loved anyone after Elena, but I was wrong. There's no comparison between Bella and Elena. The more time I spend with Bella I realized what Elena and I had wasn't love. I was so naïve at the time. Now I can see clearly. Elena was just taking advantage of me; I was the one in love, the one that kept the relationship moving forward. I'm glad I didn't give the earrings to Elena, she didn't deserve them. Maybe I'm being too harsh, maybe Elena did love me in a twisted way. I'll never know.

Now, my present and hopefully future is with Bella. My hope is growing now that I know Bella loves me, though I don't know what to say about her parents. Charlie's reaction surprised me, I've never been hit before and I have never hit someone. Renée on the other side seems to be cheerful and indulgent. I had to lie to my parents, something I hate doing, but I did it to be able to hang out with Bella. If they knew the true they wouldn't let me visit her.

I was about to sleep when I remember the kissing sessions I shared with Bella. Her lips are so delicate, I was afraid to hurt her. A sudden feeling of guilt hits me and the realization hurts even more. What had I done? I had given Bella an un-chivalrous treatment. She deserved better than that. She wasn't cheap, she wasn't ordinary. But what could I do right now? It wouldn't be proper to call her at this time, she would probably be sleeping. I couldn't let her think I had no respect for her, so I sent her a text message. While I waited for her reply I realized this wasn't the right way either. I had to talk to her in person. I waited and waited and never received her response. Maybe she had fallen sleep? It was very late and it had been a long day, so probably she was asleep. I decided to sleep and see Bella first thing in the morning. I'm fortunate to dream of Bella.

I swear I could smell her essence in the dream. It was so vivid, so real, and so good. Her smile lights up my life. But I realized my dream has come to an end. What's lighting up my day is the bright sun outside. This is another sign, today is going to be a great day. I checked my cell phone and realized Bella hasn't answered, but that doesn't stop me to get ready to pick her up. I need to amend things with Bella. While drying my hair I notice the faint bruise around my mouth and cheek, it doesn't look that bad, but it sure hurts. I'm just glad the bruise is fairly noticeable. My mom is an expert with bruises; she had to heal and hide uncle Eleazar's multiple scratches and bruises when they were young.

I have breakfast with my family. We try to share as much time as possible. That's something I love about my family. Alice and I drive our way to school, though I take a detour to pick up Bella right on time. I hate being late. Today I'm driving the BMW 1M Coupe, needless to say that I love this car; it was a surprise gift from my dad when we came to Forks. Bella is waiting for me at her porch, she looks lovely. As accustomed I head over and open the passenger door.

Bella seems to enjoy the songs being played in the stereo, I'm glad she likes the songs that I love. I can't wait any longer and I park in a spot near the entrance of the parking lot. I notice that Bella looks worried. I know the comments that are being said about her accident. I assure her that I'm here for her. I decide to go ahead according to plan. I apologize for my behavior and most important for not treating her like a lady. Bella seems surprised and she mentions she should have stopped me when I was kissing her. Secretly, I'm glad she didn't. "I don't regret kissing you, that was an important factor in making yesterday one of my favorite days. I do regret not asking you to be my girlfriend, I should have asked you that before kissing you." I grab the bouquet I assembled with flowers from my garden and handed it to Bella, she seems stunned and I caress her face "I thought that I was alone and lost in the world. I was a wanderer heading nowhere, but you've become the compass I needed in my life; and for that I'm grateful. I know that I'm being selfish. I don't deserve you in my life, but it would make me very happy if you granted me the honor of being your boyfriend." Bella starts crying, that's a reaction I hadn't expected. I'm not sure if she's happy or if she's upset. As if she could read my thoughts, she hugs me and pats my hair. That's it, we belong to each other. I'm overloaded with many emotions and I shed some tears. That was unexpected too. But I guess everything with Bella is unexpected. Then she starts talking "You're not the only one that needed comfort and clarity. You are so dear to me and you make me feel safe and happy, and no one has made me feel that way before. So at the risk of being selfish it would be my honor to be your girlfriend."

I hold her close to me and proceed to kiss her gently on the lips. Bella's response is very passionate and quite frankly I like it. Her hands are longing while going from my hair to my back. My muscles tense at her touch, to make things more interesting her hands are now on my chest. She's exploring it cautiously but determined. Her touch on my skin feels so good. Our passion is escalating quickly; her hands are now on my abdomen, she's exploring every muscle. She seems pleased with what she feels and I'm satisfied with the entire workout I do every day. I'm intoxicated with Bella, her touch, her essence. Everything about her is pleasant. Then clarity hits me and I realized where we are. We're in plain sight, well not exactly plain sight thanks to the smoky windows, but we are in the school parking lot. Although that's something to consider, I'm more worried about what could happen if we continue like this. To make my point, Bella's hand starts moving down my abs. I put my hands on hers and we take a moment to catch our breath.

We are now back in our respective seats. Most boys would have never stopped a girl from surrendering completely to them. I'm not one of those guys. It's a moral value that I'll never break. It's not because I made a promise to anyone, it's not a religious commitment either. It's something I treasure dearly and I want to share that moment with one girl. That girl would have to be my wife. I value Bella as a woman and I won't do something that belittles her. I just hope Bella feels the same way. It's not that I don't appreciate her delicate and beautiful body. I turn around and see Bella wiping some tears from her face. "I'm really sorry Bella. I don't know what got me. I wasn't thinking clearly, I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. Please, forgive me". I said while my hand rests on hers.

"I know Edward, I don't know what got me either. I… I've never done something like this." I'm glad to hear that. Maybe she thinks the same way as I do. "I guess we both got carried away with the moment. You make me so happy Bella." She thanks me for the flowers and hugs me. This time I kiss her blushing cheek.

**Bella's POV**

Edward puts his hands on mine and stops its journey. I catch my breath; I hadn't realized I was in desperate need of air. My face must be red as a tomato because I feel like if I had a fever; I'm so self-conscious right now, I don't know what got me. What was I trying to do? Why did Edward stop me all of the sudden? What does he thinks of me now? I'm not even sure of what to think about my involvement in the recent events… A word with S comes to my mind and I feel dirty. And just like that tears are pouring down my cheeks. I go back to my seat and try to steady myself, I wipe the tears with the back of my hand. Edward's blushing and chewing his lips, my nervous tick has spread to him. He seems to be chiding himself, then he sees me crying and holds my hand.

"I'm really sorry Bella. I don't know what got me. I wasn't thinking clearly, I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. Please, forgive me". It appears that I'm not the only one having remorse.

"I know Edward, I don't know what got me either. I… I've never done something like this." I bite my lower lip, I feel so ashamed.

"I guess we both got carried away with the moment. You make me so happy Bella." There's another blush on his cheeks.

"You make me more than happy Edward. I didn't thank you for the flowers, they're lovely." I hug him tight. He returns my display of affection with a peck on my cheek. This time I'm the one blushing.

"I guess we'll have to walk now, the parking lot is full of cars." Edward points to the once empty spots. I'm grateful the car has tinted windows. I blush just of thinking of having an audience. "I guess you're right" I look at the clock on the panel and add "We'd better hurry, it's almost time for the warning bell."

Edward unlocks the doors and I retrieve my backpack. I don't want to leave the flowers, but where will I put them? They'll wither in my locker. On my way to open the passenger door, I'm stopped by Edward gentleness as he helps me out of the car. We hold hands thru the parking lot. I can see people staring as we walk to the main entrance. I can even hear them gossiping about it. I feel so inhibited. Edward on the other side is beyond himself. He seems to be glowing and floating instead of walking. He's so confident; I wish to be like that.

We finally reach the door just in time as the bell rings.


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

* * *

**Chapter 14**

**Bella's POV**

Valentine's Day has always seemed to me as an egotistical day for people in a relationship. I have never understood why there's a day to celebrate love. Shouldn't love be commemorated every single day? But those thoughts changed now that I'm in a relationship. And I couldn't ask more of Edward; he's the perfect boyfriend. I'm not saying that because I have a vast experience with boyfriends but quite the opposite. He's my first and hopefully only boyfriend. So I compare him with my friend's boyfriends. Needless to say he has beaten all the records.

Edward promised me a big surprise for Valentine's Day. I tried to pry Edward's sister Alice to get a clue on what he's planning to do but she has been resilient about it. I know she's having a hard time keeping the secret, so I decided to stop her suffering and just wait. Mike has invited Jessica to a romantic dinner at Vezzavio's, which sounds very cliché but I couldn't wait more from them. They cover every aspect of what a couple should do. Eric and Angela are the opposite. They break all the standards of a liaison. Angela asked Eric for a date and that's how they became a couple. Every aspect of their relationship is very interesting to say the least. Today is not the exception. They are going to dive in La Push. It wouldn't sound crazy if it wasn't because the water is freezing at this time of the year. They assured me they are using special apparel for the occasion. I just had to smile and wish them the best. I'm not the only one wondering what the special surprise is. My group of friends is as curious as me.

I must confess Jessica and Mike weren't as happy as Angela and Eric about my relation with Edward. In fact, I could swear they were almost mad. I knew Mike had had feelings for me in the past, and I thought he was happy with Jessica. I put aside their hostility as I had done with most of the school. It seemed like almost the entire student body at Forks High School was shocked to know Edward and I were an official couple. The leader of those students is Rosalie Hale. She has made it very clear she dislikes me. And her resentment has increased now that Edward is my boyfriend. I knew she was interested in Edward as every girl in the school. Edward has been shunning every mischievous move Rosalie has thrown against me. I was starting to lose my patience but her attacks have decreased considerably. Her attention is now focus on a new senior student called Emmett. He's all muscles and charm. He's remarkably funny, a facet I haven't seen in Rosalie. I feel bad for Alice, she hasn't been as cheerful as I remembered her being. Edward told me she was sad because she had broken up with her boyfriend. Their relationship didn't cope well with the distance. I'm sure Alice will find a boyfriend in no time. She's very attractive and chirpy so I cross my fingers for her.

After an excruciating day at school, I'm on my way home. I've decided to pack Edward's gift in a gift box. I can't wait to see his face when he opens it. I take a shower and start prepping myself for the big night. Since the incident, my parents have changed. They are more permissive and they are caring and loving. It wasn't hard to get my curfew extended for the occasion.

I'm wearing black pants and a blue shirt. I decided to wear Grandma Masen's earrings. They match with everything, but I only wear them for special events. I'm curling my hair to create soft waves. I apply eye shadow in a palette of blue and black mascara. I add some soft pink blush to my cheeks and a reddish lipstick on my lips. I usually don't wear makeup, but I sure enjoy girly moments like this. I like to look good for Edward, and he doesn't seem to mind my lack of makeup on a daily basis. This should be a surprise for him. I gather my coat and my purse containing Edward's present. I can't wait to see his face when he opens his gift. I got him a Classical Music Collection subscription for his iPod. I know how much he loves classical so it's worth every penny. I spend most of my savings for his present; but I can't always get back to work and make more money. The value of my present can't even compete with the earrings. Edward has assured me they are hand-me-downs of his great great-grandmother and they couldn't cost a lot of money. I just couldn't believe they weren't expensive so I researched and found out a similar set of earrings and they are quite expensive. I had never imagined expending thousands of dollars in a piece of jewelry. I feel guilty. I could feed a small village with their value, but I could never give them away. I know how important they are for Edward and his family.

There's a knock on the front door and I head to check who it is. Looking through the peep hole I can't believe my eyes. Edward is striking; he's wearing formal attire. Black pants and a matching jacket, a white shirt and a beautiful blue and gray tie. I had never seen him in suits and he makes my mouth water. His hair is combed smoothly to the right; its copper tones resemble a halo over his head. In a way he is my angel; he saved me from myself. I open the door and Edward surprises me with a bouquet of fresh lilies and daffodils. I thank him for the flowers and let him in, I head toward the kitchen and hunt for a vase to put the flowers. Then we head to Edward's car. Inside Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata is playing in the speakers, the soothing notes ease my nerves and I relax.

I still have no idea where we're heading, but we are driving thru a familiar path. We are now in the posh side of Forks. The streets are full of cars and the upscale restaurants are jammed, so we're having a fine dinner. That sounds good; I mean I've never eaten in a classy venue. I just wondered where we're going to park; it seems like there's not an empty space at all. Edward seems oblivious and continues to drive along the street. To my surprise we left behind the upscale side of Forks and we continue straight ahead. Minutes later Edward pulls his cell phone out of his pocket and announces our arrival in a few minutes. I wonder who he called and where we are. I've never been in this part of the city. Edward helps me out of the car; he looks content by the look of my face. I'm in awe. The place is surrounded by trees and flowers; I could swear it's a replica of the Secret Garden. I feel like in a fairy tale, except that this feels so real. The smell of the nature is wonderful. There's a small white wooden bridge ahead of us, I see water passing underneath. Clumsy as always I trip on my way to the bridge. Luckily, Edward was holding my hand and grabs me across my waist before falling down. We are face to face and I can hear my heart fluttering along Edward's. I feel my cheeks betraying me, turning scarlet red in a split second. Edward gives me a peck on the forehead and we keep our way.

After walking for some minutes, Edward announces we are getting closer. The sun is starting to set and the sky is now a mix of orange and pink. Edward instructs me to keep my eyes closed and he guides me some steps then he let me open my eyes. We are surrounded by a canopy of flowers, there's a small table and two chairs; one in front of the other. Edward politely moves the chair so I can sit down, then he sits. The table contains a beautiful crystal candelabra and matching goblets, two white placemats each one set with a beautiful china service and sparkling silverware. Edward directs my attention to the sky which is now a striking purple, the last sunrays are dissipating in the horizon. I can't imagine a better Valentine's Day.

A waiter pass a plate of white and black truffles, needless to say they tasted delicious. I tried to do something I've seen in movies. I grabbed one truffle and stretched my arm across the table and fed it to Edward. He liked my idea and proceeded to feed me one, it actually tasted better than the previous one; maybe is just my imagination. Then the garçon returns to retrieve the dishes and serves us an asian mandarin sad, that's one of my favorites; the sesame dressing is delicious. Edward and I exchange glances during dinner, he looks great in candlelight. The dinner follows with the main dish, chicken cordon bleu. It smells wonderful, and tastes the same. Edward's gaze is penetrating; the yellow flames of the candles intensify it**.** I feel like he can see beyond me. I realize at that moment that he hasn't kissed me today. My lips are burning with desire; so far he has just hugged me and gave me a peck on the forehead. I've never thought I was going to be so desperate for a boy. I used to repel couples kissing in public. I didn't understand what the urge was of some girls to have a boyfriend; I found it senseless. But now I understand it and I treasure every moment with my beau. I thank him for the lovely evening and he tells me the night's still young. Our server comes and gathers our dishes. Edward asks him for more sparkling water and for the dessert. I'm beyond full, I don't think I could eat more. I politely tell him that I just want more water less the dessert. Edward insists to at least try some of the dessert, I hesitate; but seeing his pleading eyes I give up. I recognized the dessert as it's being set on the table, crème brulee; my appetite is back. It's like if Edward had retrieved a list of my favorite food; I love every single dish.

Out of nowhere a melody starts playing, Edward asks me to dance with him. I feel color leaving my face. I'm petrified of dancing; I'm such a klutz. I have no ear-feet coordination whatsoever. "B… but I can't dance. I'll smash your toe or something." "I'll guide you the entire song. Please Bella, it's only a song." There he goes again with his begging eyes, I can't say no to them. "Ok, but only one song, promise?" "Yes, I promise it'll be just one song." We head outside the canopy and we are now covered by the twinkling stars and the deep blue sky. I don't recognize the lyrics to the song; I don't even know the language, but it's a lovely melody. Suddenly Edward starts singing the song; I recognize some French words. _"Et dans tes yeux, mes yeux, plonger, traverser l'océan. Poser enfin la main sur toi. Et dans tes bras, mes bras, tomber, emportée par l'élan. Laisser enfin glisser mes doigts._ _On aura le ciel. Un peu des anges, les ailes, on s'envole toi et moi_." I've always loved Edward's voice. French speaking Edward melts my heart. He's fluent; I've forgotten he lived in France for many years. We continue dancing thru the song, Edward keeps singing close to my ear. My skin shivers by the proximity of his mouth to my ear. He's just making me suffer; teasing me the entire song. My stomach quivers, I can't resist the temptation of kissing him. Finally the song ends and Edward and I are still embracing.

* * *

_**A/N:** I don't own the song in this chapter. Song: "On aura le ciel" sang by: Sofia Mestari. Lyrics by: Pierre Legay, Benoît Heinrich._

_Translation for the French lyrics: "And in your eyes, my eyes, we dive across the ocean. Finally place my hands on you. And in your arms, my arms fall, carried by the moment. Finally let my fingers. We have the sky. A little angel, wings, we fly you and me."_

___Thank you for reading and reviewing. I appreciate each one of your comments._


	15. Chapter 15

_**A/N: **I won't have internet access during the weekend that's why I uploaded the chapter earlier than expected, I know it's short but I didn't want you to wait longer to read it. As always thank you for reading and reviewing. It means a lot ot me._

* * *

**Chapter 15**

**Bella's POV**

Tonight was the best night of my entire life, I'm still reeling. I couldn't ask for anything else, everything was perfect. Edward is now taking me home, he hasn't kissed me yet. I thought we were going to kiss while we were dancing, but we didn't. I wonder why he's acting that way, or maybe I'm being paranoid. Maybe couples don't need to kiss on every date, but the night hasn't finished; I could still steal a kiss from him.

"Thank you for my surprise, I love it!" I say sincerely.

"The surprise hasn't finished." He says with a suspicious grin.

"It hasn't?" I wonder what else he has planned.

"There's a bonus surprise. I hope you like it."

"I'm sure I'll love it." He just smiles and continues to drive. I relax in my seat listening to the songs from the Classical Music Collection I got him for his iPod.

"By the way, I didn't thank you for your gift Bella. I was thinking in buying it one of these days."

"I'm glad you like it. I know how much you enjoy classical music, so I researched and found this amazing collection. But it can't compare to your surprise; that must have cost a fortune." Edward snorts as I say that.

"Bella, you don't have to worry about the money. You could have bought me a paperclip and I would still treasure it with all my heart."

"You would?"

"I would, because it comes from you and that's all that matters to me."

I had never thought that Edward didn't mind my lack of funds as it had never come to mind that his family was rich. But that didn't matter to me either. In fact, we could have stayed in my house and I would have been as happy as I am now.

"I feel the same way Edward; you don't have to spend a lot of money on me. You just need to spend time with me and I'll be happy."

"I know. It just makes me happy to see your face when we do something you haven't done or when we see something you hadn't seen. I like to do all those things for you Bella and believe me money is not an issue. Don't worry about it Bella. I rather spend it making you happy than to leave it in the bank." I have nothing else to say. It does make me happy to be able to experience all the things Edward and I have done in the past days.

I look around the window and notice a familiar place. We are heading to Edward's house. My nerves arise and I'm feeling my heart beeping faster and faster as we get closer. I haven't met Edward's parents not because I didn't want to, but because they've been busy and our schedules have never matched; until now.

"Bella, I hope you don't mind if I introduce you to my parents tonight. They've been dying to meet you." I can tell this is very important for him. His voice is full of emotion. Although I'm a ball of nerves I'm curious to meet them.

"I want to meet them too. Do you think they'll like me?"

"I'm sure they'll love you. They are nice people." If Edward reflects his parents, I'm certain they're amazing human beings.

This is the first time I'll know Edward's house from the inside. I've known the exterior and it's magnificent. Edward parks his car in the massive garage, which is loaded with luxury cars. I count eight cars. We proceed towards the house, Edward is holding my hand. "It'll be alright." He tells me in my ear then he brushes his lips down my neck. I shiver at his contact and my heart reacts at the same time pumping more blood to my cheeks. I'm feverish. Why is he doing that? What's with the constant teasing?

Alice interrupts my line of thought hugging me as soon as she sees me entering the house. "Bella, I'm so glad to see you! Did you have fun? How was it? Did you and Edward have a great time? Did he kiss you?

As I try to recover from Alice's questioning, a delicate female voice reverberates thru the house. "Alice, what did I tell you about making guests feel comfortable? And do you really want to know about your brother's date?" I turn around and see a beautiful middle-aged woman in the staircase. She's wearing a white satin dress with a black belt across her waist. Her hair, the color of caramel, falls in soft waves down her back and her eyes are emerald green. Edward takes my hand again and we walk towards his mother. I'm speechless, I knew his parents had to be beautiful, but I wasn't expecting his mother to be stunning. She's in the last step of the stairway; we are a couple of steps away from her. Just as Edward was about to introduce me to her a man makes his way down the stairs. He's in his mid-forties; he has striking blond hair and matching blue eyes. He's tall and has a poise posture. He's wearing beige pants with a black belt and a white linen shirt. I can tell for sure that Edward has his father's smile. He reaches Edward's mother and places a hand around her waist. We are now face to face and I've just realized I was chewing my lower lip as I do every time I'm nervous. I let go of my lip. Edward proceeds with the introductions.

"Mom, this is my girlfriend Bella. Bella, this is my mother Esme." She hugs me tight, now I know where Alice's embraces come from. I return the hug. "Nice to meet you Bella. Edward has talked wonderful of you." I smile shyly. It seems that I've lost the ability to speak; Edward notices it and proceeds to introduce me to his father.

"Dad, this is my girlfriend Bella. Bella, this is my father Carlisle." He gives me a firm handshake and then hugs me. "Welcome to the family Bella." I'm still unable to speak; I don't know what's wrong with me. I've never been so nervous, but then again; I've never met a boyfriend's parents. Thankfully I have a talkative sister-in-law. "Don't they look great together?" Alice's remark is answered with awe. Then Esme proceeds to talk. "What a host am I? I haven't offered you a drink. Do you want something hot or cold? It seems to be cold outside. Do you want some tea? Coffee? I'm starting to notice that Alice resembles her mother. I want to tell her that I'm fine, that I don't want to bother her; but words fail me again. My lips feel numb as do my fingertips. A way of heat surrounds my body. Suddenly everything looks blurry. I'm wrapped in nothingness. I hear voices but I can't understand what they're saying. Darkness overtook me.


End file.
